It is good to come out when you feel like doing so. Also, ensure that you take control of this situation and keep in mind that it can end up becoming more of a process than an event. Here are things you need to know when you want to come out:
It Is Not a Must to Come Out
Many people believe that coming out is a great weight off their shoulders. However, some people think that their sexuality is private and don’t want to come out. Remember that it’s up to you to decide. It is a good idea to come out when you feel confident and comfortable to do so.
Coming Out Can Be Such a Positive Experience
Coming out can be liberating. This is because you feel like you have been authentic with your family members, friends, and colleagues. Your coming out could also encourage others who are just like you to come out.
Many people are afraid to come out because they don’t know how other people will react
People may be afraid to come out as they believe that the will not be accepted or they will be seen differently. Therefore, in case someone comes out to you, the best way to respond is to say: “I still feel the same about you.”
If you are shocked and need some time to process the information, tell the person that you need some time to process. Tell the person that your feelings will not change just because of coming out.
Worries and concerns often vary depending on the age of the person who wants to come out
Young people are usually concerned about reactions and acceptance among their peers and worry about bullying. Old people on the other hand particularly those who are in a heterosexual relationship and perhaps with children may have to deal with many dilemmas.
In case you are planning to come out to your children, ensure that you tell them that you will still be the same person and that you will always love them and nothing will change. If possible, ask your ex-partner to be there when you come out to your children.
Give Some People Time to be Shocked
Always remember that some people will be shocked and will need time to process the news. Be sensitive to other people’s feelings. Come out at a quiet, calm time so that you may have time to talk about it. As I said earlier, coming out can be more of a process than an event.
Don’t Let The Reaction of Others Affect You Deeply
Keep in mind that even if family or friends react negatively, it may be because they are only shocked and need time to process the information, and it will not necessarily be how they will always feel. Therefore, give them time to process the information. Remember those first reactions are not always lasting reactions.
Consider Writing a Letter If You Are Very Nervous
Are you nervous about coming out? If so, then consider coming out through a letter and then follow up with a visit or phone call. This will enable those who receive the letter to process the information, but you still retain full, control of the whole situation.
You Should Always Stay in Control of the News
It is very important to know that you are the one who should be in full control of the whole situation. Knowing this will help you choose a comfortable medium of communication. You can either choose to come out through face to face communication, text, phone call, social media, or email.
Keep in mind that some mediums offer more privacy than others. In case you don’t want to tell many people at once, consider using old-fashioned communication methods. If you would like to come out to one family member at a time, tell every member that you are informing one person at a time.
It May Be a Good Idea to Build a Support Network
If you are unsure of how some of your loved ones may react, build a support network around you before coming out. You can do this by coming out to a person you trust. Also, ensure that this person will be supportive. It may be a good idea to have this person with you when coming out to others.
No One Should Be Forced to Come Out
If you have reasons to believe that someone you know may be LGBT, know that you can’t force them to come out. However, you can foster an environment where that person feels safe and supported to do so.